1. as a general rule, enjoys the company of children or old people more than that of her peers (There are, of course, many exceptions to this rule; if you are reading this, you are probably one of them).
2. knows more about current research trends than popular culture.
3. shaves her legs on a weekly basis at best.
4. does not own hair brush.
5. would rather cook with her grandmother and/or shoot the political breeze with her grandfather than attend most parties.
6. enjoys cross-stitching.
7. likes to go to sleep at eleven and wake up before seven.
8. has pooped in the woods/will tell you about it.
9. cannot abstain from using fancy technical jargon in everyday life.
10. goes to UGA, where the gender-breakdown of the student body is wildly disproportionate (70% female, 30% male).
11. loves garlic.
12. and onions.
13. wears old spice deodorant on occasion.
14. does not always shower in a manner that is... consistent.
15. wants to barf whenever she smells perfume.
16. chose a major that affords her class with only one boy.
17. aforementioned "boy" is middle-aged, married, and has children in high school.
18. spends Sunday afternoons making lists like this.
19. big jim has set the bar at an almost impossible height.
20. has somehow managed to surround herself with the most beautiful friends imaginable.
21. Has not yet met anyone bold enough to take her on.
DISCLAIMER: I hope this makes you laugh. (because it's a joke [but every word totally true])
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
way to go, kirby! it definitely made me laugh. hey, i can attest to about 60% of what you said, and i'm married...but, well..i did marry robby, so does that count?
you'll find a robby one day! i can't carry on a political conversation to save my life, and i don't use fancy technical jargon, and i don't wear old spice, ever... i can't cross stitch, don't know about current research trends, and don't know anything about UGA... are we still friends?
of course we are
ok... the thing about lists like these... is that even though it's a "reasons not to date kirby" list, for the right reader, mr. right, I suppose you could even say, it turns into a "reasons to date kirby" list. I mean, I would want to date you after reading this list. except I am a girl. and with that, my comment ends, because it just got SUPER weird.
PS - I wear perfume, you jerk!!!!
Well, i like the perfume that you wear - most likely because of your moderation in its use. Keep in mind that we had lived together for months before I realized that you wore perfume. I always just thought that was how you smelled.
i really think your list is funny, and want to say that I do about 1/2 of the things on your list pretty regularly... Beardy will come along and have a list just like yours (but with manly stuff) and you two can laugh about them forever...
ps: see i did read your blog...
and pps or pss... on # 20, i think you are BEAUTIFUL!!!!
Post a Comment